Ever notice? Somewhere along the line your teachers, parents or other kind and helpful folks seemed to believe that when something is difficult to accomplish the end result is better. As opposed to the thing you do quickly, even if it turns out well. Surely, we think, if Activity A appears to be easy, it must be of lesser value than Activity B that requires every ounce of our blood, sweat, and tears.
What if the truth is somewhere in between? What if difficult and easy are subjective?
For example:
Ask my beloved to write a paragraph with two adjectives, one adverb, and a transitive verb and his eyes will glaze over as he agonizes and researches his way to success. Difficult.
Ask me to play a tune on the piano and my eyes will glaze over as I stumble and fumble to recall which black or white key matches the one on the sheet music in front of me. Difficult.
Or?
Ask my beloved to diagnose the spots on the veggies or the mysterious striations on the leaves and he’ll have it figured out in no time. Easy.
Ask me to help sort and organize some drawers or an entire room and I’ll have it figured out in no time. Easy.
How about this perspective? Notice the steep stairway in the accompanying photo? A real workout to get to the top for sure. On the other hand, what if I told you there was a path, out of your immediate sight, that was smooth, with a gradual climb to get to the top? Would the one among us who chose the more strenuous stairway achieve better results because they took the more difficult path? Maybe. Maybe not. Here’s why.
If you broke a sweat and strained to get to the top via the steep steps and I had to do the same on the gradual incline, then better has nothing to do with the outcome. Each of us, in our own way, had to deal with the difficulties particular to our own intellectual, emotional, and physical being.
Just because something appears more difficult doesn’t make it the better way to go.
All of us have a mix of hard stuff and easy stuff in daily life, and the reality is, we best not ignore a task or activity [or person] for the sole reason it might be difficult. By the same token, maybe we need to let go of the long embedded idea that we will somehow be more virtuous or more special if we spend the majority of our time finding the most difficult path because to do that is somehow better.
You. Me. We’re different. Yes, we share our humanity, however, if, as the sages tell us, the journey is more important than the destination, then what each of us learns in the process of the ascent is what has meaning and value.
Given my physical issues, those steps would be a formidable challenge yet the desire I would have to persevere, even on what seems the smoother or easier path, is no less a part of the process.
If the goal is that both of us reach the summit, wouldn’t we be wiser—to say nothing of more compassionate and loving–if we didn’t expend our time and energy trying to link success to our limited perception of what is easy or difficult?
Do I tend to judge others for their ideas about what is hard or easy? Why?
Do I judge myself against some vague notion that difficult is better? Why?
